Aspergers, online dating, my divorce

Well as most of you know, my son’s father decided that he no longer wanted to be with us and left a few weeks ago. I found out a few lies that happened while we were still together but other than that I really do not know what lead to him leaving and he’s not saying.

A lot of you have said that we should try to work on things and for personal reasons that I can not and will not discuss publically, that will NEVER happen. My son and I will be fine without him and have actually been really well these past few weeks.

My son has had only one or two meltdowns since he father left which is a HUGE improvement compared to the one or two a week he was having previously. He has also slept all night every night since his father left. He has not slept all night in over a year. He has gained 3 new words. He is happy and bubbly and for all of these reasons I believe, actually I know, we will be fine.

Now that I am single everyone keeps talking to me about dating. Which is something that I don’t think I’m ready to do yet, but when I am ready I will probably be doing online dating.

Now I don’t know about most of you  but some people I know, my mom included, freaked out over that. “You mean meeting strange people you don’t know!???” I’ll explain it to you how I explained it to my mother this afternoon.

With my aspergers it is hard for me to just go up to people and talk to them. Actually even if they initiate the conversation it is still hard for me to talk. I’ve gotten to the point in life where I can actually look at people now instead of staring at my feet, but talking is just still way too awkward for me. I might say the occasionally hey how are you, but other than that, I am at a loss of words. Sometimes I don’t know what to say or sometimes I tend to talk way too much and bore people. So because of this I am usually quiet.

Meeting someone on the internet is easier because I don’t have to think about my tone of voice or if I’m rambling. I don’t have to worry about if I’m looking at them. I get a chance to talk to someone and kind of explain myself before hand to make things less awkward once you met in public.

My mom thinks the internet is full of “strange, weird people”, so I logged on to a dating site and showed her who my matches would be. Guess who the first 4 were? Guys I went to high school with. Weird and strange? Maybe. But not in the sense she is thinking.

So. Tell me how your aspergers affects you socially. Tell me if you’ve ever tried online dating and how it went. And tell me how your lives have been in general.

 

I’ve had a bit of a writer’s block lately but I think I’m finally over that, so prepare to hear from me a lot more!

❤ xoxox

 

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